Phoenix Nicole

So. I updated. Saved the draft. And sometime during the night the draft found some crack cocaine and when I came back to see it this morning it was high as a kite.
Hence: the rewrite.
ALSO.
Complaint: It will only load 8 of my pictures. There are more. I'm a little ticked off right now, Blogger. GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER BEFORE I LAUNCH MILITARY INTELLIGENCE ON YOUR SERVER.
*ahem*

So before I show you pictures of the world's cutest kid (that'd be mine. Not Achille. So put that in your pipe and smoke it, sis! Mwahaha), I'll "update".

I'm still stuck in the United States Navy. Hooyah. I'm still stuck at my boring job in security. I still miss working for the investigators. Who wouldn't miss sitting in an office listening to people talk about crazy military criminals and interrogating suspects?? Apparently they needed to do a little more of that in ol' Fort Hood...maybe...idk...really that whole thing is messed up. Some of us talking about creating a "lets trip over his ventilation cord" mission thing morning. Pretty sure it's gonna work out. Suffocation = way more dramatic way to die then injection or electric chair-ing. Personally, I think he should face a firing squad. But that's just me. Crazy lunatic...YOU CAN GET OUT OF THE MILITARY FOR BEING CRAZY YOU KNOW!! YOU DON'T HAVE TO SHOOT UP PEOPLE TO MAKE YOUR POINT!! Sheeeesh...

Anyway, I may be able to get a job as a journalist/photographer in the next 9-11 months. That'd be super sweet. I'd be stuck on an Army base for 6 months in Maryland but NO BIG DEAL!! It's right next to D.C. which = STUFF TO DO WHEN WE ARE BORED. The Smithsonian, theatre, music, etc etc etc! WOOT! It'd be super awesome. Plus the job would be a lot more enjoyable than anything else they had to offer me.
So hopefully that goes SUPER.

Anyway...just sitting around these days, waiting to hand in my request for leave over Christmas. Yesterday we went to Hobby Lobby to find some photo albums and the Christmas supplies were in...and 50% off...I love Christmas...I love decorating...I'm a Christmas decorating fiend!! AAA!! I went a little nuts...we spent 50$ when we could have spent 12$ if I had stuck to the plan. BUT I COULDN'T. TOO MUCH CHRISTMAS FOR ME TO HANDLE!! I seriously become hopped up on 12 cans of Red Bull just by seeing Christmas stuff- but Without the Red Bull. I was bouncing around with huge eyes and throwing everything within reach into the cart. Allen was calmly picking it up and putting it back on the shelves...heh heh heh...I did manage to wrangle 3 boxes of lights and four packages of ornaments to the checkout counter though.

Sooo...I guess this is Phoenix part of the blog now...Here are some pictures. Only 8. Thank you Blogger...

HI! I'm Phoenix! I'm awesome! I don't cry very much except when I'm tired and I like to raise my eyebrows really high at everything. I also am trying really hard to laugh but I JUST CAN'T DO IT. This results in a lot of unnecessary attempts at tickling by my parents and they really just need to back off. They like to have photo shoots and try to capture the most hilarious faces possible. This results in me looking like a crazy baby. Thanks for the self esteem boosters, mom and dad. Case and point: the picture below.

This was part of an attempt to make me look like I like to bite people. If things don't let up on the photo end, I just might make that "funny idea" come true...SO WATCH YOUR NOSE THE NEXT TIME YOU COME CLOSE TO MY FACE! AHAHAHA! *ahem*

Mom thinks its just about the most hilarious thing in the world to spike my hair. I don't really mind actually, I just get revenge by generating some more Cradle Cap and shedding all over her black shirts.

So, while I was in Kansas visiting my Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, and Grandparents a couple weeks ago, someone gave mom this pair of giant flannel pants that double as a blanket that I can't kick off. She thinks its fun to just pick up the pants and let me dangle around in them causing the worlds' worst wedge (if I didn't wear diapers). Someday I hope there will be justice.

I got a new dress and was instantly crammed in and photographed repeatedly. I barfed on the dress. Enough said.




Sometimes it's actually pretty fun to hang out with mom and dad. They make funny faces and like to wrap me up and sing to me. It doesn't excuse all the other behaviors of course, but it does make me a little less inclined to gnaw off their ankles once I learn to crawl.

See? I can sit up super good! Also great job on making these pictures oldest to youngest mom...

But what I wanna know is why I can't watch TV until I'm two! COME ON PEOPLE!! I'M SICK OF HEARING WINNIE THE POOH'S VOICE COME FROM BEHIND MY HEAD!

I still like to sleep a lot, but not in a consistent pattern. Like last night Mama got up to pump because the night before I hadn't woken up to eat until morning! She stayed up for 45 minutes pumping. Then when she was done, I woke up! She had to stay up another hour to feed me a bottle and put me back to sleep.

That was Karma for making me wear the wedge pants.

So anyway. Life is pretty good. Hopefully Mama gets that job in Maryland so I can live closer to Auntie Amanda - then maybe someone will buy me more stuff. My parents said I don't need stuff because I have more clothes then both of them put together.

Hello. I only have three pairs of shoes.